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The Illustrated Works of Shakespeare
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Illustrated Works of Shakespeare, The (1990)(Animated Pixels)[!][CDTV-PC].iso
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04_02
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1991-04-10
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223 lines
Another part of the Park.
Enter HOLOFERNES, SIR NATHANIEL, and DULL.
Nathaniel Very reverent sport, truly, and done in the testimony of a
good conscience.
Holofernes The deer was, as you know, sanguis, in blood; ripe as the
pomewater, who now hangeth like a jewel in the ear of caelo,
the sky, the welkin, the heaven; and anon falleth like a crab
on the face of terra, the soil, the land, the earth.
Nathaniel Truly, Master Holofernes, the epithets are sweetly varied,
like a scholar at the least; but, sir, I assure ye, it was a
buck of the first head.
Holofernes Sir Nathaniel, haud credo.
Dull 'Twas not a haud credo, 'twas a pricket.
Holofernes Most barbarous intimation! Yet a kind of insinuation, as it
were, in via, in way of explication; facere, as it were,
replication, or, rather, ostentare, to show, as it were, his
inclination, after his undressed, unpolished, uneducated,
unpruned, untrained, or, rather, unlettered, or, ratherest,
unconfirmed fashion, to insert again my haud credo for a
deer.
Dull I said the deer was not a haud credo, 'twas a pricket.
Holofernes Twice-sod simplicity, bis coctus!
O, thou monster Ignorance, how deformed dost thou look!
Nathaniel Sir, he hath never fed of the dainties that are bred in a
book.
He hath not eat paper, as it were; he hath not drunk ink; his
intellect is not replenished; he is only an animal, only
sensible in the duller parts;
And such barren plants are set before us that we thankful
should be,
Which we of taste and feeling are - for those parts that do
fructify in us more than he.
For as it would ill become me to be vain, indiscreet, or a
fool,
So, were there a patch set on learning, to see him in a
school:
But, omne bene, say I, being of an old father's mind;
Many can brook the weather that love not the wind.
Dull You two are bookmen: can you tell me by your wit,
What was a month old at Cain's birth that's not five weeks
old as yet?
Holofernes Dictynna, goodman Dull. Dictynna, goodman Dull.
Dull What is Dictynna?
Nathaniel A title to Phoebe, to Luna, to the moon.
Holofernes The moon was a month old when Adam was no more,
And raught not to five weeks when he came to fivescore.
The allusion holds in the exchange.
Dull 'Tis true indeed: the collusion holds in the exchange.
Holofernes God comfort thy capacity! I say the allusion holds in the
exchange.
Dull And I say the pollution holds in the exchange, for the moon
is never but a month old; and I say beside that 'twas a
pricket that the princess killed.
Holofernes Sir Nathaniel, will you hear an extemporal epitaph on the
death of the deer? And, to humour the ignorant, I have called
the deer the princess killed, a pricket.
Nathaniel Perge, good Master Holofernes, perge; so it shall please you
to abrogate scurrility.
Holofernes I will something affect the letter, for it argues facility.
The preyful princess pierced and pricked a pretty pleasing
pricket;
Some say a sore, but not a sore till now made sore with
shooting.
The dogs did yell; put 'L' to sore, then sorel jumps from
thicket;
Or pricket sore, or else sorel; the people fall a-hooting.
If sore be sore, then 'L' to sore makes fifty sores o'sorel.
Of one sore I an hundred make, by adding but one more 'L'.
Nathaniel A rare talent!
Dull [Aside.] If a talent be a claw, look how he claws him with a
talent.
Holofernes This is a gift that I have, simple, simple; a foolish
extravagant spirit, full of forms, figures, shapes, objects,
ideas, apprehensions, motions, revolutions: these are begot
in the ventricle of memory, nourished in the womb of pia
mater, and delivered upon the mellowing of occasion. But the
gift is good in those in whom it is acute, and I am thankful
for it.
Nathaniel Sir, I praise the Lord for you, and so may my parishioners;
for their sons are well tutored by you, and their daughters
profit very greatly under you. You are a good member of the
commonwealth.
Holofernes Mehercle! If their sons be ingenious, they shall want no
instruction; if their daughters be capable, I will put it to
them. But, vir sapit qui pauca loquitur. A soul feminine
saluteth us.
Enter JAQUENETTA and COSTARD.
Jaquenetta God give you good morrow, Master Parson.
Holofernes Master Parson, quasi 'pers-on'. An if one should be pierced,
which is the one?
Costard Marry, master schoolmaster, he that is likest to a hogshead.
Holofernes Piercing a hogshead! A good lustre of conceit in a turf of
earth; fire enough for a flint, pearl enough for a swine.
'Tis pretty, it is well.
Jaquenetta Good Master Parson, be so good as read me this letter: it was
given me by Costard, and sent me from Don Armado. I beseech
you, read it.
Holofernes Fauste precor gelida quando pecus omne sub umbra
Ruminat-
and so forth. Ah, good old Mantuan! I may speak of thee as
the traveller doth of Venice:
Venetia, Venetia,
Chi non ti vede, non ti pretia.
Old Mantuan, old Mantuan! Who understandeth thee not, loves
thee not. [Sings.] Ut, re, sol, la, mi, fa. - Under pardon,
sir, what are the contents? Or, rather, as Horace says in his
- what, my soul! Verses?
Nathaniel Ay, sir, and very learned.
Holofernes Let me hear a staff, a stanze, a verse. Lege, domine.
Nathaniel [Reads.]
If love make me forsworn, how shall I swear to love?
Ah, never faith could hold, if not to beauty vowed;
Though to myself forsworn, to thee I'll faithful prove.
Those thoughts to me were oaks, to thee like osiers bowed.
Study his bias leaves and makes his book thine eyes,
Where all those pleasures live that art would comprehend.
If knowledge be the mark, to know thee shall suffice.
Well learnd is that tongue that well can thee commend;
All ignorant that soul that sees thee without wonder;
Which is to me some praise that I thy parts admire.
Thy eye Jove's lightning bears, thy voice his dreadful
thunder,
Which, not to anger bent, is music and sweet fire.
Celestial as thou art, O, pardon love this wrong,
That sings heaven's praise with such an earthly tongue!
Holofernes You find not the apostrophus, and so miss the accent. Let me
supervise the canzonet. Here are only numbers ratified; but
for the elegancy, facility, and golden cadence of poesy,
caret. Ovidius Naso was the man: and why, indeed, Naso, but
for smelling out the odoriferous flowers of fancy, the jerks
of invention? Imitari is nothing; so doth the hound his
master, the ape his keeper, the tired horse his rider. But,
damosella virgin, was this directed to you?
Jaquenetta Ay, sir, from one Monsieur Berowne, one of the strange
queen's lords.
Holofernes I will overglance the superscript.
[Reads.] "To the snow-white hand of the most beauteous Lady
Rosaline."
I will look again on the intellect of the letter, for the
nomination of the party writing to the person written unto.
[Reads.] "Your ladyship's in all desired employment,
Berowne."
Sir Nathaniel, this Berowne is one of the votaries with the
king, and here he hath framed a letter to a sequent of the
stranger queen's, which, accidentally, or by the way of
progression, hath miscarried. Trip and go, my sweet, deliver
this paper into the royal hand of the king; it may concern
much. Stay not thy compliment, I forgive thy duty. Adieu.
Jaquenetta Good Costard, go with me. Sir, God save your life!
Costard Have with thee, my girl.
[Exeunt COSTARD and JAQUENETTA.
Nathaniel Sir, you have done this in the fear of God, very religiously,
and, as a certain father saith-
Holofernes Sir, tell not me of the father; I do fear colourable colours.
But to return to the verses: did they please you, Sir
Nathaniel?
Nathaniel Marvellous well for the pen.
Holofernes I do dine today at the father's of a certain pupil of mine,
where, if before repast it shall please you to gratify the
table with a grace, I will, on my privilege I have with the
parents of the foresaid child or pupil, undertake your ben
venuto, where I will prove those verses to be very unlearned,
neither savouring of poetry, wit, nor invention. I beseech
your society.
Nathaniel And thank you too, for society, saith the text, is the
happiness of life.
Holofernes And certes the text most infallibly concludes it.
[To DULL.] Sir, I do invite you too; you shall not say me
nay. Pauca verba. Away! The gentles are at their game, and we
will to our recreation.
[Exeunt.